Two posts in one day? After not posting for a month? Shocking. I shock myself. But I was disturbed by this note that has been going around Facebook. And I just had to set the record straight.
HOW TO DATE A MED STUDENT 101
1. Don't expect to see them. Ever. Exag. I still get to see Ruari every week. My family and high school friends still get to see me. And we in UP Med have highly varied extracurricular activities. I know one who is on the dragon boat team that trains every morning before class. A few of my classmates participated in an international chorale competition with the UP MedChoir. The sororities get to hold fashion shows, for goodness' sake.
2. Accept the fact they will have many affairs. With their books. This is true. Netter, Moore, Berne, and I have become quite intimate these past months. Oh, and Acland. I can't forget Acland.
3. Learn to hide your “ew, gross” reactions when they tell you all the stuff you never wanted to know about your bodily functions. Pwede. This can also apply to the stories we tell about our cadaver dissections. Haha.
4. Support them when they come home after each test, upset because they failed—and gently remind them after they get their well above passing grade how unnecessary the “I’m going to fail out of medical school and never become an MD” dramatics are. I've been there. And you've left out the more important part--when we rise up, move on, and do better the next time around.
5. Each week they will have a new illness. Some will be extremely rare, others will be more mundane. Doesn’t matter. They will be certain they have it (no second opinions necessary.) Med school can, and will, turn even the sanest into a hypochondriac. Date them for long enough, and you’ll become one too. I've been warned about this "medical student syndrome." It's not true. We do sometimes complain of myesthenia gravis (when we're tired at the end of the day) or ptosis (when we can't keep awake during lectures)--but only as a joke. Learn to tell the difference. And not to generalize.
6. There will be weeks you'll forget you even have a boyfriend—friends will ask how he is and you'll say, “What? Who? Oh....right. He's well...I think.” Not true. Throughout our two-year relationship, Ruari has been in med school. We still see each other every week, and we communicate constantly.
7. They'll make you hyper-aware that germs are everywhere and on everything. Even though you used to walk into your home with your shoes on, and sit on your bed in the same clothes you just wore while riding the subway, or sat on a public bench in, you'll become far too disgusted to ever do it again. Believe me, it's going to get bad...you'll watch yourself transform into the anal retentive person you swore you'd never become. And when you witness others perform these same acts that, before you began dating your med student, you spent your entire life doing too, you'll wince and wonder, “Ew! How can they do that? Don't they know how many germs and bacteria they're spreading??!” Er...maybe in higher years? But I doubt. And honestly, I know some med students with less than hygienic personal habits. Haha.
8. Romantic date = Chinese take-out in front of the TV on their 10 minute study break. Ruari and I watch movies, go out for dinner, go out with each other's friends--just like normal couples. We do study together, and that's the nice thing about us both being in med.
9. A vacation together consists of a trip down the street to Walgreens for new highlighters and printer paper. Excuse me. We're not that sad. A classmate of mine went wakeboarding with her boyfriend over the long weekend. I know someone else who's going to Boracay.
10. Their study habits will make you feel like a complete slacker. For them, hitting the books 8-to-10 hours a day is not uncommon, nor difficult. You'll wonder how you ever managed to pass school on your meager one hour of studying per night. Eight to ten hours a day??? After nine hours of class? You've got to be kidding.
11. They're expected to know everything. Everything! The name of the 8 billion-lettered, German sounding cell that lives in the depths of your inner ear, the technical term for the “no one's ever heard of this disease” disease that exists only on one foot of the Southern tip of the African continent. But ask them if your knee is swollen, or what you should do to tame your mucous-filled cough, or why the heck your head feels like someone's been drilling through it for oil for two weeks straight, and they won't have a clue. I have classmates who have done circumcisions, even before first year started. And we are already allowed to conduct medical missions, which involve patients consulting about just that--swollen limbs, coughs, headaches, and more. The whole point of med school is to prepare us for practice, not just to teach us the theories.
12. “My brain's filled with so much information, I can't be expected to remember THAT!" will be the standard excuse for forgetting anniversaries, birthdays, and, if you get this far, probably the birth of your first-born. Birthdays are birthdays and anniversaries are anniversaries. We still celebrate those. I'll celebrate my birthday even if I have to take a biochem exam then. Haha.
13. You'll need friends with unending patience who pretend never to get sick of listening to your endless venting and complaints. Or, you'll need to pay a therapist who will pretend never to get sick of listening to your endless venting and complaints. It's your choice if you want to spend your four or five years in med school complaining. But you should think about it if you do; maybe you shouldn't have taken med in the first place.
---
Of course I can only speak for UP Med students (and St. Luke's hehe). But seriously, whoever wrote this obviously is not a med student. Or maybe a med student from some sadistic med school. Don't underestimate us. We're still human. We're capable of more than just studying.
HOW TO DATE A MED STUDENT 101
1. Don't expect to see them. Ever. Exag. I still get to see Ruari every week. My family and high school friends still get to see me. And we in UP Med have highly varied extracurricular activities. I know one who is on the dragon boat team that trains every morning before class. A few of my classmates participated in an international chorale competition with the UP MedChoir. The sororities get to hold fashion shows, for goodness' sake.
2. Accept the fact they will have many affairs. With their books. This is true. Netter, Moore, Berne, and I have become quite intimate these past months. Oh, and Acland. I can't forget Acland.
3. Learn to hide your “ew, gross” reactions when they tell you all the stuff you never wanted to know about your bodily functions. Pwede. This can also apply to the stories we tell about our cadaver dissections. Haha.
4. Support them when they come home after each test, upset because they failed—and gently remind them after they get their well above passing grade how unnecessary the “I’m going to fail out of medical school and never become an MD” dramatics are. I've been there. And you've left out the more important part--when we rise up, move on, and do better the next time around.
5. Each week they will have a new illness. Some will be extremely rare, others will be more mundane. Doesn’t matter. They will be certain they have it (no second opinions necessary.) Med school can, and will, turn even the sanest into a hypochondriac. Date them for long enough, and you’ll become one too. I've been warned about this "medical student syndrome." It's not true. We do sometimes complain of myesthenia gravis (when we're tired at the end of the day) or ptosis (when we can't keep awake during lectures)--but only as a joke. Learn to tell the difference. And not to generalize.
6. There will be weeks you'll forget you even have a boyfriend—friends will ask how he is and you'll say, “What? Who? Oh....right. He's well...I think.” Not true. Throughout our two-year relationship, Ruari has been in med school. We still see each other every week, and we communicate constantly.
7. They'll make you hyper-aware that germs are everywhere and on everything. Even though you used to walk into your home with your shoes on, and sit on your bed in the same clothes you just wore while riding the subway, or sat on a public bench in, you'll become far too disgusted to ever do it again. Believe me, it's going to get bad...you'll watch yourself transform into the anal retentive person you swore you'd never become. And when you witness others perform these same acts that, before you began dating your med student, you spent your entire life doing too, you'll wince and wonder, “Ew! How can they do that? Don't they know how many germs and bacteria they're spreading??!” Er...maybe in higher years? But I doubt. And honestly, I know some med students with less than hygienic personal habits. Haha.
8. Romantic date = Chinese take-out in front of the TV on their 10 minute study break. Ruari and I watch movies, go out for dinner, go out with each other's friends--just like normal couples. We do study together, and that's the nice thing about us both being in med.
9. A vacation together consists of a trip down the street to Walgreens for new highlighters and printer paper. Excuse me. We're not that sad. A classmate of mine went wakeboarding with her boyfriend over the long weekend. I know someone else who's going to Boracay.
10. Their study habits will make you feel like a complete slacker. For them, hitting the books 8-to-10 hours a day is not uncommon, nor difficult. You'll wonder how you ever managed to pass school on your meager one hour of studying per night. Eight to ten hours a day??? After nine hours of class? You've got to be kidding.
11. They're expected to know everything. Everything! The name of the 8 billion-lettered, German sounding cell that lives in the depths of your inner ear, the technical term for the “no one's ever heard of this disease” disease that exists only on one foot of the Southern tip of the African continent. But ask them if your knee is swollen, or what you should do to tame your mucous-filled cough, or why the heck your head feels like someone's been drilling through it for oil for two weeks straight, and they won't have a clue. I have classmates who have done circumcisions, even before first year started. And we are already allowed to conduct medical missions, which involve patients consulting about just that--swollen limbs, coughs, headaches, and more. The whole point of med school is to prepare us for practice, not just to teach us the theories.
12. “My brain's filled with so much information, I can't be expected to remember THAT!" will be the standard excuse for forgetting anniversaries, birthdays, and, if you get this far, probably the birth of your first-born. Birthdays are birthdays and anniversaries are anniversaries. We still celebrate those. I'll celebrate my birthday even if I have to take a biochem exam then. Haha.
13. You'll need friends with unending patience who pretend never to get sick of listening to your endless venting and complaints. Or, you'll need to pay a therapist who will pretend never to get sick of listening to your endless venting and complaints. It's your choice if you want to spend your four or five years in med school complaining. But you should think about it if you do; maybe you shouldn't have taken med in the first place.
---
Of course I can only speak for UP Med students (and St. Luke's hehe). But seriously, whoever wrote this obviously is not a med student. Or maybe a med student from some sadistic med school. Don't underestimate us. We're still human. We're capable of more than just studying.
